"What if?" is the refuge of the defeated

We all have those moments. Those moments where we wonder how our life might have been different if we had chosen this path or that person. These “what ifs” can plague a person. There was a time in my past, where I allowed them to get the best of me.

At some point, we realize that wondering about the “what ifs” is really about being passive. It’s about waiting for your life to happen, instead of making your life happen. In some cases, it becomes a point of living life as a victim, which, frankly, is an insult to the real victims.

Our lives make us who we are today. I know that is of little comfort if you are unhappy with your life, but true self realization requires you to accept all that your life is. Whether good or bad, it is those experiences of joys and dejection shape us. You can choose acceptance or resistance.

If I resist the truth of my life and fret about “what if?” then I am missing the wonder of what I have. My shared sunrises with my dear wife, the joy of my children and the beauty of this world I would of missed. I may have had similar moments, but I would not seen them with these eyes.

As I grow older there are very few things I know, but I do know this. At the end of it all, I wouldn’t change a thing and I couldn’t ask for any more than that.

Photo by J.R. White - Union Station DC 2006 (Enhanced)